Content Warning: This blog includes the topic of suicide and domestic abuse. If you or someone you know needs help, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 988 or the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1.800.799.7233.
Life hurts—sometimes deeply. Freddie Amos knows this firsthand. However, she overcame depression, trauma, and abuse by God’s grace. Now, the Lord is using her story to help other young adults break free from similar battles. Extraordinary pain can lead to extraordinary purpose only with the help of Christ. How are you surrendering your story to God and letting Him use it in extraordinary ways? Continue reading for highlights from this episode of the Even You podcast, or watch the full interview with Freddie Amos below.
How did God cultivate a story in you that you are eager to share with others?
It’s really my own story. I come from a divorced family. I love my dad. I love my mom. They have been great parents to me, but I struggled when I was a kid. I was diagnosed with depression when I was in middle school. I remember a lot of my life just being sad, feeling lonely, feeling by myself. I went to counseling once, and I hated it. That’s maybe the reason why I never wanted to be a counselor. I dated, and it was really unhealthy for a long time. I was that girl that I see who has a lot of pain, suffering, confusion, and isolation. How do you have healthy relationships? Where does your identity go? What happens when you don’t know the Lord? That was really my story. And when the Lord saved me, I never felt ashamed of my story. This is what happened to me. It is really cool that the Lord saved me from this. And so it was really automatic. I want people to know that this can happen to them, too, because I am not an exception. I am in the masses of people who don’t know the Lord and then get accepted into His family because I’ve said, “Yes,” to what He’s done for me. It was really impactful for me to ask, “What can I contribute to the ministry?” My entire life. I don’t really have to pull much because my life has been rocky for a lot of it. I can relate to a lot of hardship. I can relate to suicide. I can relate to bad relationships, emotional abuse, manipulation. I relate to all of that. It’s just all in me already. It’s my story.
What’s weighing on your heart as you see what is burdening young adults today?
It was hard to hear about abuse and neglect of children, and then hearing problems that are different, such as being I’m anxious about a test. It’s hard to say, “These are not different.” God cares about them the same. It’s hard to relate to both of those clients in the same way. But to answer your question of what burdens me the most, honestly, it’s domestic abuse. That’s not a pretty answer. That’s not like depression or anxiety; it’s the trauma. I gravitate toward people in trauma because I want to help them and support them. But it’s hard to hear what people go through. There have been multiple times when I sit in a counseling session, and I will say, “God, I don’t understand why You’re letting this happen. I don’t even understand how I can help this person feel like You’re a good God when I’m sitting here thinking, Why would God let this happen?” It really humanizes me because I don’t have all the answers as a counselor. I’m also just as confused and broken and sinful and messed up as the person sitting in front of me. But I think what hurts me the most is when people are just mistreated, and that really comes from trauma. Their brains rewire to always be in fight or flight. One of the hardest things for me to see is when someone always feels frightened by everything in all their surroundings and knowing at the same time that counselors really can’t do anything about that. We are not the healers. We are not the ones who are going to make everything better. I am not God. I can’t take away their problems. They have to wrestle with the Lord, and my job is to sit with them and listen to them and ultimately surrender them back to the Lord.
You also have stories of individuals that you’ve seen find healing and hope by surrendering to the Lord. Does that keep you going?
It does. I had a client get baptized not too long ago, and that’s really sweet. That’s really special. I really don’t think I played a part in that, but just to be able to hear what she’s been through and then know that she was able to find the Lord, it’s cool to witness. And even when it’s not that big and grand but hearing a client say, “Oh, I get it now. I don’t have to be treated that way. I can control my emotions. I realize I don’t need sessions as often as I thought I did because I’m a lot stronger mentally,” those are the things that keep me going. And even in the hard moments, I really just feel the burden and the call to sit with them and be the hands and feet of Jesus in that moment for them. Jesus had to feel and experience so much pain from His friends. And I say to Him, “Jesus, You felt this while You were on Earth. I need that strength. I need that compassion. I don’t want to burn out. I don’t want to have compassion fatigue and throw away these problems because You never did when Your disciples were asking You questions.” Even when we say, “Are you kidding? You’re asking Jesus that question?” He never came back with a harsh response. It was always gentle and compassionate. There are still so many great moments. I love my job. I get to do really incredible things with my job, but it’s also really hard.
The Even You Podcast
On the Even You podcast, we want to empower ordinary people to say, “Yes!” to extraordinary purpose. Hear how everyday believers are using their gifts to have an eternal impact on people’s lives around the world. Learn more, share, and listen to the podcast now!
