Worship

“It’s Always Been You” by Phil Wickham

Scripture

“And you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.” -Mark 12:30 (ESV)

Introduction

One of the greatest gifts of 2020 was meeting my dear friend, Alexandria Watkins. We were in Austin together on an Arise women’s mission team, where we met for the very first time. She and my daughter, Lizzy, had an immediate friendship because of Lizzy’s months in the COVID-19 unit at Parkland Hospital and Alexandria’s work treating scores of patients all over the nation. It was shortly after that that our lives began to intersect at a deeper level. I have seen her experience a season of pain and persecution in this past year, and you will read some very authentic words from her journey in the medical field. But what I am watching come forth in her is a depth of maturity and tenacity and perseverance and quite calmness as God has trained her hands for battle. This woman is in all definitions a warrior. But she is a warrior who has worshipped, and what is coming forth is a faith more precious than gold and a depth of love for Jesus even she didn’t plan to receive in suffering. Enjoy this excerpt from Alexandria in the last of our four-part devotional series from Mark 12:30.

Understanding Moral Fatigue

Alexandria shares her experience:

Over these past few months my emotional, physical, and spiritual strength have been vanishing. As I have been meditating on the Word and talking with the Lord, I started doing some soul searching and reflecting over the past year’s trials and tribulations as a health care provider. There is so much malevolence, greed, and immorality in the health care sector that one can lose sight of the promised outcomes provided to us in the unprecedented book I like to call, “Introduction to Survival: How to Thrive in a Fallen World.” You may know it as the Bible.

During these quiet times, I sat and wondered where I would get the strength to continue to mature and develop as a Christian health care provider while practicing with moral fatigue? Moral fatigue is a term primarily used in health care because of the nature of our work, and being in the constant position of making a decision where the right thing to do is unclear and filled with life-altering consequences. The questions of “How will I determine if it was worth devoting my life to my patients, and how will I know if it has all been worthwhile?” also ran simultaneously in my mind while sitting with the Holy Spirit. It has been said that to determine if you have lived a life worthwhile, you must accomplish something worthy of being remembered. “Worthy of being remembered.” What does that even mean? The apostle Paul tells us that to live a life worthy of the gospel we must rejoice in our suffering for Christ (Philippians 1:27-29) and live out of the blessings given to us through Christ (Ephesians 1:1-14). In Jesus’ inaugural address, the Sermon on the Mount, He declares the beatitudes and closes the declaration of blessedness by rejoicing in persecution (Matthew 5:3-12). The Lord rejoices in the strength and resolve and worship that is born in us because of persecution. The Kingdom of Heaven is made evident through the lives of those who live out of Christ in them, the hope of glory.

The Science of Strength and Joy

I surely do not believe we have to go out and seek suffering; we live in a fallen world, suffering will find us. After all, righteous living is obnoxious to non-believers and will surely bring about persecution on its own. Throughout my search for a true definition of “strength,” I have found that true strength is being able to rejoice in our suffering for Christ because we are living a life worthy of the name of Jesus. Having the strength to REJOICE during suffering (i.e., being faced with moral fatigue) is not just a blessing the Lord graciously gives us; it is also good for our health.

Did you know that negative thinking, sadness, bitterness, animosity, and anger (just to name a few) yield quantifiable measurements of toxins produced by the endocrine glands (glands that secrete hormones), producing antagonistic effects on the body?

Here are the endocrine glands and some symptoms related to negative thinking, sadness, bitterness, animosity, anger, etc:

• Pineal gland: negative symptoms from toxins include insomnia, nervousness, feeling of impending doom
• Pituitary gland: negative symptoms from toxins include lack of energy, memory difficulties, visual deficits, reduced fertility
• Pancreas: negative symptoms from toxins include increased risk for diabetes, decreased immunity
• Ovaries or testes: negative symptoms from toxins include reduced fertility and sex drive
• Thyroid gland: negative symptoms from toxins include lack of energy, constipation, skin sensitivities, hair loss
• Parathyroid gland: negative symptoms from toxins include decreased immune system and nervous system
• Hypothalamus: negative symptoms from toxins include lack of concentration, energy, dizziness, panic attacks, depression
• Adrenal glands: negative symptoms from toxins include irritability, constant fatigue, headaches, muscle cramps

Did you also know that when we rejoice in the Lord, we have feelings of harmony, benevolence, love, and delight, which enhance health by releasing chemical substances within the body thus improving physiological pathways? Here are some examples:

• Oxytocin, the “love hormone”: important for reproduction, feelings of attraction, and bonding
• Dopamine, the “reward chemical”: feelings of pleasure, motivation, and keeps you mentally alert
• Norepinephrine, the “energizer”: alertness and energy
• Serotonin, the “mood stabilizer”: balances appetite, controls perceptive and cognitive functions, equilibrates sexual desire, manages sleep-wake cycle
• Vasopressin, the“homeostasis hormone”: improves memory process and inflammation management

Loving the Lord with all our STRENGTH is advantageous to our health. Rejoicing in our suffering takes strength, a strength that can only come through the Lord of Lord’s, coming in at 6 feet and 2 inches, 190 pounds, battle-tested, resurrected, and eager to say, “Blessed are you” (OK, maybe I’m off on the height and weight, but everything else is true!).

This past year I harvested a God-given strength, chose not to live in fear, and stood on scientific, clinically-proven research methods all while suffering disgrace within the medical community because I chose not to follow the status-quo and to not withhold knowledge, practices, and medications from patients. I can’t help but be reminded of Acts 5:39-41, where the apostles suffered disgrace because they stood firm in the name of Jesus. It was spoken that if these apostles were speaking the truth, they would not be able to be stopped and that the accusers were only fighting against God. It is in this Scripture that I find my strength to continue to stand firm and delight in God’s will for my journey as a health care provider. Choosing delight instead of trepidation while going against the health care system’s norms not only glorifies the Lord but is also beneficial to the health (physical and spiritual) of me and my patients.

In the meantime, it is our job as believers (not just health care providers) to help show people what they are missing and teach them how to live out the Great Commandment: address spiritual cardiology, identify an illness within the soul, create new neurological pathways, and achieve true health from the strength within by rejoicing in the suffering. The Lord has equipped us to “Love the Lord God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength (Mark 12:30).”

The Broader Context of Christian Suffering

I love the perspective Alexandria writes from because we feel the beat down of persecution even when we have bone deep conviction and passion. It’s hard and painful to endure. Trials and testing are inevitable, and our growth is actually dependent on them. James writes, “My fellow believers, when it seems as though you are facing nothing but difficulties, see it as an invaluable opportunity to experience the greatest joy that you can! For you know that when your faith is tested it stirs up in you the power of endurance. And then as your endurance grows even stronger, it will release perfection into every part of your being until there is nothing missing and nothing lacking (James 1:2-4, TPT).”

Faithful Endurance

Sisters, we are being made ready for our Bridegroom. We can visibly see this happening in the Bride of Christ globally as she has endured much hardship and persecution. I remember sitting on a plane with a man discussing the rapture of the Church and his belief that American Christians will not endure persecution or suffering because Jesus will just come back and get us. I had to push back on his myopic perspective by just simply having a global worldview. Why would believers all over the world be enduring such harsh persecution and it never touch the shores of America? Unfortunately, many of our churches have done a poor job of preparing the Bride in America for her soon coming day. When the going got tough, many just closed their doors in 2020. But praise God for the men and women who endured and formed house churches in response. Praise God for the awakening of many believers who continue to cry out for revival in their cities. Praise God for those who ran to the front lines to minister no matter the cost to themselves. Remember the story of my dear translator, Cigdem, who said to me with tears streaming down her cheeks, “I pray that I will die for the gospel so that my country can know Jesus.” That’s a woman who has endured persecution and suffering for being a Christian in the Middle East. We will get there, sisters. By the grace of God, we too will get there. (In 2020, Arise women shared the gospel with nearly 1,000 people and saw more than 500 say, “Yes,” to Jesus! Sisters, WE ARE getting there!)

One thing I can testify to that I have seen in Alexandria’s life, Kristen’s life, Sarah’s life, Patrice’s life, Patti’s life, Kel’s life, Christina’s life, Kathy’s life, and the lives of many more women who have been tested and tried in the fire of affliction, is that yes, they come forth as gold. But God is using them to go back and strengthen their brothers and sisters.

“Simon, Simon, Satan has asked to sift all of you as wheat. But I have prayed for you, Simon, that your faith may not fail. And when you have turned back, strengthen your brothers” -Luke 22:31-32

And then Peter, carries these words deposited in him by Jesus and says something similar to the believers he went back and strengthened: “And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast. To him be the power for ever and ever. Amen (1 Peter 5:10-11).”

Peter endured as Jesus prayed for him and commissioned him out of his suffering. With even greater authority, Peter turned to the Church he had been ministering to, scattered everywhere from persecution, and testified to the grace and restoration of God. Jesus will restore you, and you will go and strengthen others because you have walked through the valley of the shadow of death, and Jesus carried you the whole way! And you will love Him with deeper depths and higher heights!

“I have looked back to times of trial with a kind of longing, not to have them return, but to feel the strength of God as I have felt it then, to feel the power of faith, as I have felt it then, to hang upon God’s powerful arm as I hung upon it then, and to see God at work as I saw him then.” -Charles Spurgeon

We aren’t going to get out of suffering and persecution. It’s coming, and it’s coming faster than we are all wanting. But we will not endure alone. If God is for us, who can be against us? We will be walking together in it, strengthening one another, and teaching each other how to worship in the midst of it! Like the worship song at the beginning of this devotional, “All my life, your love was breaking through,” and He won’t stop now. He’s making us ready for Heaven where we get to love Him face-to-face!

A Prayer for Endurance

Lord, I pray for an anointing of grit and faith and endurance and strength over my sisters! Would You help them to throw off the world and run for You, no matter the cost of what they have to leave behind. I pray that these ones would carry the fires of revival and passionate songs of worship that have been written in dark nights. I pray that You would give them prayers for others that come out of seasons of suffering, that break through iron gates and set captives free. I pray that these ones, Your glorious ones in the land, will come forth as gold as You have promised in Your Word. May they not be defined by their suffering but rather by their maturity and depth and faith as they lack nothing! Strengthen them and restore them and pour out Your grace on them today. And may they love You in an even greater way with all the strength You give them! In the mighty name of Jesus! Amen!

“So that the tested genuineness of your faith—more precious than gold that perishes though it is tested by fire—may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ. In this you rejoice, though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been grieved by various trials,” -1 Peter 1:6-7 (ESV)